Thursday, August 25, 2005
Finally, the coin flips
So far, i have heard exactly 4,680,702 stories involving Western men who move to Japan, for a year, and either love it so much that they stay, or get married. These stories are tedious and rather unexciting. Even the first few I heard were too intolerably mushy, yet I was forced to listen to many, and bear witness to several examples of Westerners with Japanese wives.
Today at work, thank god, a guy who has decided to sit next to me temporarily, has the other, more gruesome tabloid side of the expat life at the mercy of Japanese women. His story was a girl he fell in love with, moved in with, wanted to marry, and then she started selling pictures of herself on the 'net. He discovered it, challenged her, she denied it, and they split. He still can't believe that she would do something like that. Shocking, and kinda cool. Shortly afterwards, he met a girl, and went out with her. For the first time he was actually truly physicaly attracted to this chick *(a rareity for men, IMHO). He couldn't see her enough, and eventually he drew a line, and said he have to stop seeing each other if we can't see more of each other. The standoff failed him, and he lost her. Boring.
Then the stories about other people, where it really gets interesting. Many stories involving men who are denied a divorce. One guy separated from his wife, started seeing someone else afterwards. His estranged wife filed papers to sue his girlfriend on the grounds that she broke up the marriage. Another guy got married to a Japanese girl in Oz, they moved to Tokyo, and then later he moved back to Oz, she stayed here, and after a year he decided to file for divorce. She said no, despite the fact that they were both seeing other people. He moved back, did not move in with her, got another girl pregnant, and she still wont grant him the divorce. The girlfriends parents found out that he was married, and now wont let them live together until he gets a divorce. So he rarely gets to see his kid.
I guess this all relates to divorce being messy, and even more messy when it crosses languages and cultures. The moral of the story is not to get married out here - which, quite frankly, was never on my list of stuff to do. Climbing Mount Fuji will be enough of an experience.
I got the impression when I was walking to work today that this is exactly how everything should be. If someone took the time to organise a city, many an example on how to draw up a paradise would exist. Quick examples: crime is nonexistent, the streets are clean, people are courteous, education is of import, and I am taller than most.
A typhoon is coming inland today, and a few people are going home early from work just in case the trains stop running. My ears are hyper sensitive right now, and I can feel the pressure dropping as I sit still in the building. It's the same feeling I get when the lift falls from the 34th floor back down to ground in a few seconds. It will be interesting tonight.
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